Critics Consensus

Critical Consensus: "SOAP," "Material Girls" Not Screened; "Accepted" Denied; "Sunshine" Shines

by | August 17, 2006 | Comments

This week at the movies, we’ve got snakes…. on a plane ("Snakes on a Plane," starring Samuel L. Jackson), slackers on a campus ("Accepted," starring Justin Long), and Duffs on the screen ("Material Girls," starring Hilary and Haylie Duff). What do the critics have to say?

"Snakes on a Plane," the movie with the greatest title since "Dude, Where’s My Car?", has captured the imagination of the blogosphere. However, it will have to wait to capture the imagination of the critics, since it wasn’t screened in advance. The plot involves an FBI agent (Samuel L. Jackson) who, golly, would really like to expel those ophidians from the aircraft upon which he’s traveling. Since "SOAP" (as the fanboys and girls call it) has no reviews, we’re going to play our favorite game: Guess the @#&$*$ Tomatometer.


Contrary to the wishes of Samuel L. Jackson, these guys are putting the snakes on the @#&$*$ plane.

There’s something inherently appealing about a bunch of party-hearty students and their battles with the uptight squares; that’s why movie people keep trying to recapture the magic of "Animal House" and "Rock ‘n’ Roll High School." "Accepted" tells the story of a high school graduate (Justin Long) who’s having no luck getting into college, so he decides to start his own fake institute of higher learning. To his surprise, a bunch of like-minded outcasts join him. Critics say the movie has its share of laughs, but it never totally gels, and turns a little too sweet at the end. At 31 percent on the Tomatometer, "Accepted" has been waitlisted.


"Accepted": In culinary class, these guys are preparing an official South Harmon Institute of Technology sandwich.

Critics can beg, and critics can plead, but they can’t see "Material Girls" (that’s right!), ’cause the audience members with the cold hard cash are always Mr. (and Ms.) Right. Or, perhaps the people behind the latest Duff sisters vehicle feel the film is in the same artistic league as Madge‘s "Body of Evidence." Guess this Tomatometer while you’re at it.


The Duff sisters flee in anguish after their unsuccessful auditions for "Hulk 2"

"Little Miss Sunshine" was a big hit at this year’s Sundance Film Festival, and now that it’s hitting the theaters, the scribes are just as enthusiastic as the folks in Park City. This tale of a dysfunctional family hitting the road for a child pageant is Certified Fresh, and features sharp performances from its ensemble cast, particularly Greg Kinnear and Steve Carell. At 94 percent, this one’s a ray of "Sunshine." (Check out RT’s interview with co-directors Valerie Faris and Jonathan Dayton here.)

Also in theaters in limited release this week: "Factotum," the Sundance-approved Bukowski adaptation starring Matt Dillon and Lili Taylor, is at 75 percent; "The Illusionist," a tale of intrigue in turn of the century Vienna starring Ed Norton, Jessica Biel, and Paul Giamatti, is at 67 percent; Dutch import "Moonlight," a tale of risky teenage love, is at 60 percent; "Trust the Man," a rom-com starring David Duchovny and Julianne Moore, is at 39 percent; and "10th & Wolf," a story of mob family ties starring James Marsden and Giovanni Ribisi, is at zero percent.

Finally, props to XeternityX, who came closest to predicting "Pulse"’s 12 percent Tomatometer. Nobody got particularly close to "Zoom," still flying high at zero percent. Be forwarned when guessing the Tomatometers for this week’s unscreened releases: the average T-meter for movies not screened for critics is 11.75 percent.

Recent Samuel L. Jackson Movies:
——————————————-
25% — Freedomland (2005)
13% — The Man (2005)
82% — Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (2005)
18% — XXX: State of the Union (2005)
23% — In My Country (2005)

Recent Hilary Duff Movies:
———————————-
7% — Cheaper by the Dozen 2 (2005)
6% — The Perfect Man (2005)
15% — Raise Your Voice (2004)
11% — A Cinderella Story (2004)
24% — Cheaper by the Dozen (2003)

Tag Cloud

YouTube Premium Martial Arts Thanksgiving Extras game show psychological thriller 2018 HBO christmas movies slashers indiana jones Mindy Kaling best Food Network Emmy Nominations Rocketman nbcuniversal FX Columbia Pictures scary movies TCA Awards Marvel Studios Logo spider-man TCA 2017 elevated horror dc RT History sequels documentaries Nickelodeon historical drama all-time Music award winner aliens theme song Trivia child's play Mary poppins cartoon documentary strong female leads medical drama Pop TV Mystery Starz Animation Universal cancelled TV series First Look news adaptation blaxploitation vampires satire DC streaming service Spectrum Originals comiccon Travel Channel TV Land Comics on TV Elton John Walt Disney Pictures Premiere Dates franchise war Star Trek Mary Poppins Returns Election stand-up comedy YouTube Lionsgate crossover Super Bowl Country canceled Disney Channel dramedy Turner Classic Movies Awards Tour Epix Apple latino dceu USA reviews BBC America Best and Worst worst Masterpiece anime Action MTV Baby Yoda singing competition Heroines toy story RT21 Grammys Fall TV twilight true crime IFC Films Podcast Hallmark TV biography Adult Swim Toys Opinion Hallmark Christmas movies witnail Academy Awards Esquire History 20th Century Fox video television jamie lee curtis A&E Funimation social media joker Rock Song of Ice and Fire The CW revenge Emmys The Witch Sci-Fi political drama binge Creative Arts Emmys Amazon Studios canceled TV shows Lifetime Christmas movies independent GoT The Arrangement Brie Larson Tarantino streaming justice league Pop police drama chucky Binge Guide Television Academy video on demand Tubi TruTV crime thriller CNN mutant The Purge FXX HBO Go Drama Tumblr Comedy Amazon Prime Video thriller talk show Nat Geo animated hispanic Crackle period drama rotten Photos Freeform Disney Plus CBS All Access Awards versus discovery emmy awards Superheroes harry potter X-Men BET VICE parents obituary 45 boxoffice WGN Video Games name the review comedies Classic Film TCA quibi Mary Tyler Moore films Sneak Peek Spike Ovation CMT CW Seed Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Television Critics Association Paramount cancelled television BAFTA crime Winners PBS GLAAD VOD based on movie DC Comics Warner Bros. ratings 4/20 CBS Trophy Talk Certified Fresh Pet Sematary 007 USA Network movie zero dark thirty Biopics Infographic series transformers stoner AMC Discovery Channel OWN reboot Syfy TIFF Women's History Month 2020 Holiday concert NYCC Year in Review Black History Month Sundance Now Holidays TCA Winter 2020 Watching Series laika dark Red Carpet Film Festival 2016 El Rey SundanceTV Writers Guild of America 2019 free movies politics cancelled TV shows game of thrones Shondaland New York Comic Con universal monsters cops Pride Month cancelled Spring TV sequel Apple TV Plus VH1 Dark Horse Comics Mudbound spanish language See It Skip It Calendar facebook Hear Us Out FOX rotten movies we love YA Arrowverse Western werewolf richard e. Grant Valentine's Day Ghostbusters screenings a nightmare on elm street Avengers criterion adventure dragons Chernobyl what to watch Lifetime OneApp First Reviews ABC Star Wars travel dogs Pixar screen actors guild doctor who cats SDCC GIFs BBC One cults The Walking Dead golden globes Sundance indie movies south america hist TV renewals Cosplay Peacock Teen Bravo Tomatazos Rocky Fox News A24 TNT spinoff Black Mirror 72 Emmy Awards ABC Family diversity blockbuster TCM LGBTQ serial killer Christmas Apple TV+ unscripted MSNBC Captain marvel Winter TV Musical Reality book NBC children's TV Hulu asian-american Netflix LGBT Kids & Family President Sundance TV ghosts comics Anna Paquin festivals Pirates SXSW Comedy Central critics Paramount Network nature Cartoon Network Amazon Prime Marvel Sony Pictures IFC disaster sitcom PaleyFest Box Office Reality Competition stop motion Trailer miniseries romantic comedy Character Guide DGA zombie teaser breaking bad Polls and Games 2017 TLC science fiction comic Marathons superhero DirecTV Stephen King anthology green book fast and furious National Geographic Endgame robots Rom-Com YouTube Red hollywood DC Universe E3 APB ESPN Family Disney+ Disney Plus Crunchyroll TBS romance crime drama natural history Interview Musicals mission: impossible Amazon batman 71st Emmy Awards sag awards Quiz finale Fantasy WarnerMedia Film San Diego Comic-Con 2015 MCU spy thriller Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Summer cars Lucasfilm PlayStation casting BET Awards Oscars Disney streaming service Set visit kids Countdown cinemax Turner American Society of Cinematographers spain technology foreign BBC ITV renewed TV shows space tv talk Acorn TV Vudu Schedule 24 frames Superheroe Cannes docudrama Britbox halloween die hard FX on Hulu Nominations supernatural Netflix Christmas movies sports classics Disney Comic Book directors Shudder Showtime Horror zombies composers E! mockumentary Ellie Kemper Marvel Television HBO Max psycho cooking 21st Century Fox