Someone REALLY Hates the New "G.I. Joe" Screenplay

by | May 23, 2007 | Comments

Apparently Paramount and producer Lorenzo di Bonaventura commissioned a "G.I. Joe" script from "Swordfish" screenwriter Skip Woods — and someone out there is really furious about it.

If you’re an old-school "Joe" fan and you know all the characters and such, you’ll definitely want to read what the guys at have to say about the most recent screenplay. Personally I know nothing about the franchise except that there’s a bunch of new comic books, old cartoons, and even older toys.

But Latino Review’s "El Mayimbe" definitely seems to know his "Joe," and this guy is really steamed about the direction the project is taking. Here’s a few choice excerpts of his wrath:

"…G.I. JOE’s biggest enemy, its toughest challenge, a villain so narrow-minded in his vision and focus that he threatens to run this property into ground is none other than … LORENZO DIBONAVENTURA! A studio exec!"

"When I recently read that Lorenzo abandoned Elliot and Lovett’s draft, which we reviewed earlier, and that he wanted to do ACTION MAN and a G.I. JOE buddy team-up movie, I CRINGED! I tracked this script down and my worst fears all became realized. SKIP WOODS’ draft of G.I. JOE is a resounding disaster and a catastrophe. Everything that is wrong with Hollywood is in this one script."

"Don’t get me wrong, I like Skip Woods, but HE IS TOTALLY THE WRONG MAN for this script. Way too much exposition, way too much wise-ass wannabe cracks, and way too many speeches. For all the exposition in this script, they don’t tell the audience how these soldiers became G.I. JOE. It’s just a military man themed script with the G.I. JOE title slapped on it."

Yowch! We’re also informed that "Action Man" has somehow become involved in the "G.I. Joe" story, and also that the head villain will be called … "Cool Dude."

Source: Latino Review

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